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| One year ago, I arrived for my first day of work. Only a couple weeks before, I was desperate and contemplating accepting a position at a waste water treatment plant. I suspect that would have not gone well with the ladies.
Anyways, I was eager to start working with my team and to begin woo-ing everyone with my performance, exceling up the corporate ladder with unheard of speed. As my manager led me to where I would sit, I envisioned a large cherry oak desk with an executive leather chair. Genuine leather, not the synthetic kind that I am sitting on right now which I bought at Staples for $35 (online discount baby). On top of the desk, a cuban cigar would be waiting for my arrival, next to my name plate, "Eugene Oh - Project Engineer" engraved in gold.
Maria, my office assistant and former Ms. Venezuela, would also be waiting, with a notepad and pen in hand to write down every insignificant word I said.
As we weaved through the myriad of desks, we stopped in the middle of a corridor, narrowly congested with a long table to the right and cubicles to the left. "So, where's my office?", I asked, hoping it had a window and a view of the bay. "You are standing in it." She says. "Our group has been expanding rapidly and they are running out of desks, so we need you to sit here until things open up."
So after 12 months, I finally get my own cubicle! This is probably not a big deal to the majority of you since you most likely started out with one, but for me, it is probably the most exciting thing that will ever happen to me. Ever.
But this means I won't take it for granted. I am going to make sure I utilize every square foot of desk space by spreading out all the important documents they give me to work on. Okay I might have to bring some junk mail flyers from home so what.
The most thing I am grateful for though is now that I have some privacy, I can work in peace without any nosy people looking over my shoulder.
They haven't had time to make me a name plate yet so I took the liberty of creating one on my own. Only a matter of time...
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| I watched the movie “300” yesterday with Glunt, Dave Oh and
Jace. I thought it was great and a good
representation of the kind of movies I like; Epic battles, good fighting evil
against overwhelming odds, blood and gore, arms and legs getting cut off, men
getting speared in the throat (every movie should have at least one
throat-spearing in my opinion), and 8 lines of actual dialogue. This is definitely a guy movie and one could
argue that it is one the manliest films of our generation.
So tell me why after we got out of the theatre, all we could
talk about was:
Eugene
- “They were so buff…”
Dave - “Did you see their abs? I think they all had 12-packs. One had 16.”
Jace - “I think they were either CGI generated or
air-brushed on”
Eugene
- “Let’s go workout RIGHT now.”
Dave - “Every one of them had 20-packs. I counted.”
Jace – “Maybe they painted them right on their bodies like
in Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition. If I keep telling myself that then maybe I won't be so depressed.”
Eugene
– “They were SO buff.”
Jason – “What are we eating for dinner? I’m famished.”
K brb going to the gym. | | |
| Email sent today, at 3:09pm.
"Hello fellow roommates,
So I was about to pay this month's
Cable bill online but I realized the total was a bit higher than usual. So I
looked at the paper bill to find out where the difference was coming
from, and lo and behold, I find this line item that details a purchased
movie for $11.99. Please see attached pdf.
So I was thinking to myself, hmm, what a very peculiar title for a movie...and why did it cost $12??
Anyways,
I was laughing pretty hard today. I'm paying the bill but I DO expect
the culprit's check to be $12 more. Unless this was all a glitch on
Comcast's part, which I highly doubt knowing you two. just kidding.
Total: 136.38 - 12 = 124.38 / 3 = $41.46 each.
$53.46 for Leisure Suit Larry."
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